(no subject)
May. 15th, 2012 11:54 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shingaSo Faire time is lovely. I love all the vibrant green trees and the cool buildings and beautiful clothes and the smiling playful faces of both cast and regular attendees.
I haven't been able to walk at Faire in years, which is frustrating but okay. I miss it... walking at Faire gives me so much freedom and it's much easier to enjoy the stores and such. Last two years we've rented me an electric scooter which helps a LOT and is better than bringing my own wheelchair. They're more all-terrain and it's easy to carry my cane as well so I can turn the scooter off and walk for small periods of time.
Anyway, I'm rambling... this Saturday I had a scooter. The first comment about it was, I know, meant playfully... the loud pretzel guy called me "lazy". Like, as my name. All "Hey, LAZY!"... I showed him the cane and said "Not lazy!" and he shrugged and said "Still could be." I know it was a joke, and I took it as such... but it still bothered me. I didn't take it out on him. This happened pretty literally very first thing... we'd only been there like 10 minutes. I didn't want to let it get to me and ruin the day.
Later a comment was made by a woman working one of the shops. She got my attention as I was leaning on Will who was standing next to me. "You hungover?" she asked. I was confused, figured she was referring to me leaning on Will. I told her no. "Oh," she said. "I've just seen you walking before and figured you were on the scooter because you were hungover. I'd do that!" I was confused. For starters, I think walking would be better for a hangover than a scooter. But I corrected her, said I was disabled, etc. I'm pretty sure she had me confused with some one else anyway, unless she remembers encountering me a few years ago.
I dunno. Again, I didn't let it get to me... or, I tried. But this sort of thing bugs me even when I don't want it to. I think because people in the "real world" see a presumably able-bodied person (ie invisible disability = "you're obviously faking") and I see places like conventions and Faire as something more removed than that... in a good way. I'm rarely treated as weird or different or accused of faking or being lazy by geeks. They're better about seeing the person as they are. They're better about being around people who are "different".
So this happening not once but twice at Faire bugged me. A place I saw as "safe" felt a little violated. Not badly... again, I know they both meant it in jest. And had they been friends I would have taken it as such easier (well, the "lazy" comment isn't good no matter WHO'S saying it. protip, friends... do not joke that my disability and pain is just laziness. sets me off like you wouldn't believe)
I think it might have been a problem with the scooter. Too many people see a scooter and assume it's some "white trash" lazy person using it because they're "too fat" and can't stand to walk the amount of time it takes to get groceries. Even though, gasp, fat people can have legit disabilities too! If a person is using a scooter it's none of anyone's damn business but theirs why they need it.
But yeah, anyone accusing me of faking or lying is a HUGE rage trigger for me. I don't get mad easily. Frustrated, annoyed, snippy, sure. But not mad. Not angry. But some one calling my integrity into question makes me want to punch a number of faces in.
Bah. Rambling again. Just wanted to get this off my chest. Second first same as the first sort of thing but I wanted to say it anyway.
Back to my regularly scheduled day. Now that this rant has been typed out I feel I can let it go a bit easier and have a wonderful rest of the week.
I haven't been able to walk at Faire in years, which is frustrating but okay. I miss it... walking at Faire gives me so much freedom and it's much easier to enjoy the stores and such. Last two years we've rented me an electric scooter which helps a LOT and is better than bringing my own wheelchair. They're more all-terrain and it's easy to carry my cane as well so I can turn the scooter off and walk for small periods of time.
Anyway, I'm rambling... this Saturday I had a scooter. The first comment about it was, I know, meant playfully... the loud pretzel guy called me "lazy". Like, as my name. All "Hey, LAZY!"... I showed him the cane and said "Not lazy!" and he shrugged and said "Still could be." I know it was a joke, and I took it as such... but it still bothered me. I didn't take it out on him. This happened pretty literally very first thing... we'd only been there like 10 minutes. I didn't want to let it get to me and ruin the day.
Later a comment was made by a woman working one of the shops. She got my attention as I was leaning on Will who was standing next to me. "You hungover?" she asked. I was confused, figured she was referring to me leaning on Will. I told her no. "Oh," she said. "I've just seen you walking before and figured you were on the scooter because you were hungover. I'd do that!" I was confused. For starters, I think walking would be better for a hangover than a scooter. But I corrected her, said I was disabled, etc. I'm pretty sure she had me confused with some one else anyway, unless she remembers encountering me a few years ago.
I dunno. Again, I didn't let it get to me... or, I tried. But this sort of thing bugs me even when I don't want it to. I think because people in the "real world" see a presumably able-bodied person (ie invisible disability = "you're obviously faking") and I see places like conventions and Faire as something more removed than that... in a good way. I'm rarely treated as weird or different or accused of faking or being lazy by geeks. They're better about seeing the person as they are. They're better about being around people who are "different".
So this happening not once but twice at Faire bugged me. A place I saw as "safe" felt a little violated. Not badly... again, I know they both meant it in jest. And had they been friends I would have taken it as such easier (well, the "lazy" comment isn't good no matter WHO'S saying it. protip, friends... do not joke that my disability and pain is just laziness. sets me off like you wouldn't believe)
I think it might have been a problem with the scooter. Too many people see a scooter and assume it's some "white trash" lazy person using it because they're "too fat" and can't stand to walk the amount of time it takes to get groceries. Even though, gasp, fat people can have legit disabilities too! If a person is using a scooter it's none of anyone's damn business but theirs why they need it.
But yeah, anyone accusing me of faking or lying is a HUGE rage trigger for me. I don't get mad easily. Frustrated, annoyed, snippy, sure. But not mad. Not angry. But some one calling my integrity into question makes me want to punch a number of faces in.
Bah. Rambling again. Just wanted to get this off my chest. Second first same as the first sort of thing but I wanted to say it anyway.
Back to my regularly scheduled day. Now that this rant has been typed out I feel I can let it go a bit easier and have a wonderful rest of the week.