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Feb. 20th, 2012 06:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shingaPSA: It's possible to be in a lonely or lovesick mood even when you have a romantic partner. Yes, even if that person lives with you and you're all in love and committed and stuff. Having an SO isn't a magical fix for all one's emotional turmoil. They're just one person, it's not reasonable to expect them to make you 100% happy all the time. Sometimes the burden of your own happiness falls on you, or friends, or family.
So yeah, meh. Got in one of those moods and mentioned it on FB and had a couple of people (who I do NOT think were saying anything cruelly or anything) mention that I shouldn't feel that way because I have love. And while I get what they're saying, it still bugged me. Will is amazing and I plan on spending my life with him and I am happy, but he's not some romantic god that can satisfy my every emotional craving every second of the day. Especially not when he's sick and exhausted. And it's okay! I've at times relied too much on him to give me those warm fuzzies out of the blue, for him to somehow magically romance me into a happy stupor. But he's human, and I love him for it. Sometimes if I want those happy feelings, it has to be up to me.
And sometimes I just have to sit there and feel lonely for a little while. To feel lovesick and cold and desperate so in those moments where the fire ignites between us I appreciate it all the more.
So, yes... people in committed relationships can be lonely. I've at times felt more lonely in one than when single. It all depends on what's going on in my own head, not what's going on between us. And if it IS because of something lacking in our relationship I'd probably talk to him about it rather than moping on Facebook.
So yeah, meh. Got in one of those moods and mentioned it on FB and had a couple of people (who I do NOT think were saying anything cruelly or anything) mention that I shouldn't feel that way because I have love. And while I get what they're saying, it still bugged me. Will is amazing and I plan on spending my life with him and I am happy, but he's not some romantic god that can satisfy my every emotional craving every second of the day. Especially not when he's sick and exhausted. And it's okay! I've at times relied too much on him to give me those warm fuzzies out of the blue, for him to somehow magically romance me into a happy stupor. But he's human, and I love him for it. Sometimes if I want those happy feelings, it has to be up to me.
And sometimes I just have to sit there and feel lonely for a little while. To feel lovesick and cold and desperate so in those moments where the fire ignites between us I appreciate it all the more.
So, yes... people in committed relationships can be lonely. I've at times felt more lonely in one than when single. It all depends on what's going on in my own head, not what's going on between us. And if it IS because of something lacking in our relationship I'd probably talk to him about it rather than moping on Facebook.
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Date: 2012-02-21 03:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-02-21 03:58 am (UTC)