(no subject)
Feb. 12th, 2013 10:36 amA couple of weeks ago I'd lost 5lbs.
I haven't rechecked but I think I gained it back and more, with no changes.
I think I'll call the VA and have them check some more stuff... people have suggested, and worried, that the problem could be PCOS or diabetes. I admit the first one sounds pretty likely everything considered, and it would put me at a higher risk for the second thing (which I damn sure hope isn't the case... I only have a handful of symptoms that could be that so I'm not as worried)
My boobs are big enough that I need a bra almost all the time, so over a month ago I bought an XL sports bra. It is now so snug it's painful so I had to take it off. I'm so frustrated by all of this. Boobs too big to be useful for anything but getting in the way (it's been a long while since they were sexual in any way), I'm too fat to fit into the things I own to help out... gah.
And I am SO SICK of everyone's helpful suggestions when I don't ask for them. I KNOW I need to fix my diet up but believe it or not a low-sodium diet ISN'T FUCKING CHEAP. It's in EVERYTHING that poor bitches like me can afford. It's frustrating as fuck.
*sigh*
I need to find my DD214 and get started with the DAV for more monthly disability. Hopefully I get it up to a decent number and I can use some of my backpay for house expenses and the rest I'll save. But the month-to-month stuff would be good for bills and maybe being able to afford groceries like a goddamn adult.
Another annoyance: the handful of pushy friends always like "I know a job source for veterans, why haven't you tried it?"... these friends apparently don't pay attention. I can't work. In Texas work requires driving. Most jobs require standing and walking, even the sit-down office jobs. Especially ones I qualify for. I CANNOT GET A NORMAL GODDAMN JOB. And with pain issues I have a hard time even with the at-home art shit.
Just... venting. In extra pain the last few days with the rain and weather fluctuations. Yeah yeah "lucky you shut up whining" since it's not below freezing out. But I'm still in pain from the weather so shut up about how it's colder where you are and I have no right to complain. I get it. I never have a right to complain because some one always has it worse but has a better attitude so I'm an ungrateful whining bitch. I get it.
Hormones can fuck right off, I did not start this entry feeling angry. But I do now. Went from vaguely upset to sad to annoyed to angry. It only took me 8 minutes to type all this up and that's a lot of emotions in that time.
I should end this and drink some tea.
I haven't rechecked but I think I gained it back and more, with no changes.
I think I'll call the VA and have them check some more stuff... people have suggested, and worried, that the problem could be PCOS or diabetes. I admit the first one sounds pretty likely everything considered, and it would put me at a higher risk for the second thing (which I damn sure hope isn't the case... I only have a handful of symptoms that could be that so I'm not as worried)
My boobs are big enough that I need a bra almost all the time, so over a month ago I bought an XL sports bra. It is now so snug it's painful so I had to take it off. I'm so frustrated by all of this. Boobs too big to be useful for anything but getting in the way (it's been a long while since they were sexual in any way), I'm too fat to fit into the things I own to help out... gah.
And I am SO SICK of everyone's helpful suggestions when I don't ask for them. I KNOW I need to fix my diet up but believe it or not a low-sodium diet ISN'T FUCKING CHEAP. It's in EVERYTHING that poor bitches like me can afford. It's frustrating as fuck.
*sigh*
I need to find my DD214 and get started with the DAV for more monthly disability. Hopefully I get it up to a decent number and I can use some of my backpay for house expenses and the rest I'll save. But the month-to-month stuff would be good for bills and maybe being able to afford groceries like a goddamn adult.
Another annoyance: the handful of pushy friends always like "I know a job source for veterans, why haven't you tried it?"... these friends apparently don't pay attention. I can't work. In Texas work requires driving. Most jobs require standing and walking, even the sit-down office jobs. Especially ones I qualify for. I CANNOT GET A NORMAL GODDAMN JOB. And with pain issues I have a hard time even with the at-home art shit.
Just... venting. In extra pain the last few days with the rain and weather fluctuations. Yeah yeah "lucky you shut up whining" since it's not below freezing out. But I'm still in pain from the weather so shut up about how it's colder where you are and I have no right to complain. I get it. I never have a right to complain because some one always has it worse but has a better attitude so I'm an ungrateful whining bitch. I get it.
Hormones can fuck right off, I did not start this entry feeling angry. But I do now. Went from vaguely upset to sad to annoyed to angry. It only took me 8 minutes to type all this up and that's a lot of emotions in that time.
I should end this and drink some tea.