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Apr. 1st, 2014 05:00 pmHormones are already rough this month. Poor mood hit hard last night and I ended up crying for a stupid reason, leaving Will bewildered but still comforting. Luckily I got to sleep easily enough and had strangely calming dreams. Woke up in decent spirits. Enjoyed some of the April Fools things the internet had to offer (Netflix and ThinkGeek, good times... I really want that unicorn drinking horn)...
But I've been exhausted all day. It occurred to me that this could be explained by limited sleep. Sleep was good, but I got to bed late and got up early. Let myself have a short nap, enjoyed more calming dreams. But even with the added rest and dreams my mood is teetering on the edge again.
I've got these... strangely distant anxieties in the back of my mind that I'm almost too tired to access. Which is a good thing, ultimately... I think. It means they're not overwhelming by any means, but they're still there. Doing my best to face those worries and figure out the source and punch it right in its stupid irrational face. I know the root of some of the stuff going on, and it's not easy to fight... been doing it for years.
Therapy tomorrow. Knowing my track record my hormones will let up tomorrow and I'll try to cling to that good mood and therefore actively avoid talking about these issues in session. Which is stupid, I need to talk. That's the entire damn point. So we'll see how tomorrow goes.
But I've been exhausted all day. It occurred to me that this could be explained by limited sleep. Sleep was good, but I got to bed late and got up early. Let myself have a short nap, enjoyed more calming dreams. But even with the added rest and dreams my mood is teetering on the edge again.
I've got these... strangely distant anxieties in the back of my mind that I'm almost too tired to access. Which is a good thing, ultimately... I think. It means they're not overwhelming by any means, but they're still there. Doing my best to face those worries and figure out the source and punch it right in its stupid irrational face. I know the root of some of the stuff going on, and it's not easy to fight... been doing it for years.
Therapy tomorrow. Knowing my track record my hormones will let up tomorrow and I'll try to cling to that good mood and therefore actively avoid talking about these issues in session. Which is stupid, I need to talk. That's the entire damn point. So we'll see how tomorrow goes.
